Many women and even men look at their wardrobe when they have to go out, and are baffled. They utter that they have nothing to wear when clearly their wardrobes may be bursting open. The problem is that when you have too much of what does not match you or your lifestyle, getting dressed becomes a big stress. Often times, we are living in the past, trying to hang on desperately to youth or memories and not looking at what our lives are at the present and our goals for the future.
There is a common and wise advice that you should always dress for where you want to be or for the position you want in the future. Now, this is not to say that you need to wear a full suit if the head boss in your company wears one. However, you should dress professionally if that is the dress code of those in management. I have seen many women in my position dress like those less than their position or not even work appropriate, such as overly tight clothing or wild prints. I have genuinely appreciate the dress of some in lesser positions than me as they are very trendy and stylish, and I would wear similar outfits if I was going out on the weekend. However, for the office, since I met with clients and attorneys, I dressed very professionally.
I have a very professional work wardrobe that consists of 5 full pantsuits, 3 skirt suits, and 10 blazers that can be mixed and matched with pants, and 7 Chanel-styled blazers that can be match with work skirts and dresses. I have 12 pairs of slacks, 5 business skirts, 3 silk summer skirts, and 5 shift/sheath dresses. All the items are in black, grey, navy or pinstripe. This may seem utterly boring, but I wear silk/silky shirts and flowing blouses in black, ivory, red and royal blue under to create an elegant and more feminine look. To make the outfits not look too bland, I will wear earrings and necklaces. I also have several watches as I am a big fan of them, although I ironically need better time management at times.
Now, I am not saying that I have it all figured out as I am writing this post as my own wardrobe needs serious de-cluttering, of which I'm in the process. However, I wanted to share some of my realizations as I am going through my wardrobe. My professional wardrobe is very streamlined, but I have a lot of vagrant pieces that seem out of place and that I have insisted to myself is my casual wear. The truth is though that I go out with friends only once or twice a month, and I do not need an entire closet full of clothing to do so.
In de-cluttering, it is very important to asses your goals and daily activities, and proportion your wardrobe to that. For instance, if you work, you spend or intend to spend (for those of us in the job hunting phase), 70% of your days of the week at work, so it only makes sense that 70% of your wardrobe be professional. Your can allocate the other 25% to casual wear and another 5% for home wear or workout clothing. For very formal wear, it might be a good idea to have 3 outfits per occasion category, such as 3 cocktail dresses and 3 ballgowns. If you work from home or are a stay at home mom or housewife, you may choose to have 70% casual for home and running errands and 25% business casual for going out, meeting clients or parent teacher nights.
I personally have 50% casual wear and 50% professional wear, although I worked and intend to work 5 days a week or 70% of my week. As a result, I waste a lot of time looking for things, matching and getting dressed, and don't have room in my 2 closets and 1 dresser anymore. I need to dwindle down my casual wear to at least one third the amount.
I have held on to my casual wear because most of my close friends are in industries where their dress code is a lot more casual than mine. I have a casual wardrobe because I believe I would feel place wearing slack and blouses to hang out when they are wearing jeans and tshirts. However, this did not bother me in my early and mid twenties because during that time I wore my slacks to hang out with my friends with a simple blouse or once in a while, I would wear jeans with my work button down blouses. I have gone out of that semi casual/business style that felt very me in the last few years, and I have purchased a casual wardrobe to fit in more to my life two years ago when I took graduate classes and now as I am not currently employed. However, now that I am looking for work again, and a few times when I have work more business like wear to go out with my husband, I realize again that a business casual looks feels more of who I am. It no longer makes sense to me to have 3 separate wardrobes: formal business, business casual and extremely casual.
It is true that the world judges us by what we wears, so I do think it is important to dress professionally if that is the dress code of your firm and if you meet with clients or management in your firm because a professional image lends to your credibility. However, when it comes to what we wear for our leisure, it should be what we feel comfortable and ourselves in, and not for society, loved ones or friends. My husband likes to dress casual most of the time, and when we first me, it may have sometimes seemed that we don't match. However, it didn't matter to me how he dressed as he dressed appropriately if we were going somewhere special, and he always looked neat and clean, even in casual clothing. This is the same acceptance that others should have of us. I have had a friend in the past harp on me for not dressing in more expensive and professional clothing because that is what she chose to do. I took her advice and bought a slew of cardigans and slacks that were too large to look less attractive and more business like, but I didn't feel good about myself because it was not me. I later saw her wearing ruffles, lace and brighter colors like I did, and was very resentful. However, I did not realize that I had begun to dress to fit in with those around me, such as grad students and my casual friends, when in the past I never dressed to fit in with anyone. Some people give advice and feel that they are being helpful when they try to mold you in their own image, but it is our choice to listen or not. I certainly could have taken a few pointers from my friend, but to change myself and not look at my preferences caused dissatisfaction and waste. We must have a deep sense of ourselves, our likes and our dislikes, and not be swayed by friends or people we look up to, like superiors. My major resentment is not as much in the money I wasted first buying professional clothes to fit someone else's image or casual clothing, although I do have major regrets about they money spent and the hours lost earning that money. My biggest resentment is that I have always had a strong sense of self and preference, but stopped listening to myself and what I was comfortable with for a few years.
To return back to streamlining your wardrobe, in selecting what you keep and throw away/donate, remember to keep things in which you feel comfortable, good and yourself in.
Do share your ideas with me.
Mar 25, 2012
Green Ideas for Better Health & Productivity
Limiting the things that I bring into my home and simplifying my chores gives me more time to do what I really enjoy. I find that using environmentally friendly products are better for my health and for the environment. Here are some products and practices that I employ that makes my life a little bit easier.
SKIN CARE
Use natural skin care products. It is better for the environment and your skin. Coincidentally, most natural products have fewer ingredients than other products. Look for those with the least ingredients and with no preservatives. If you don’t use face makeup (powder, foundation, concealer, blush, etc.), steaming your face with a soft wash cloth and boiling water should be sufficient. If you run out of natural products or can’t find them near your neighborhood, products for extremely sensitive skin, such as Cephatil or Eucerin, also have fewer ingredients.
HOUSE CLEANING
Baking soda and vinegar are miracle house cleaners, which were used before cleaners were mass marketed. You can use them to deodorize, clean stoves, counter tops, tubs, sinks, etc. Check this site for recipes/idea. I use baking soda to clean pots and pans, and soak dishes in baking soda and minimal water to loosen grease and food, but I am looking for an alternative to liquid soap to wash dishes. Any ideas?
LAUNDRY/DRY CLEANING
For delicate materials, such as silk, cashmere and merino wool (which encompass half of my wardrobe due to my sensitive skin), you can just use clear, cheap shampoo, like Suave, White Rain or Tresemme to hand wash them in lukewarm water. This saves money on the cleaners and protects the environment because dry cleaning solvents are dangerous for the environment and also bad for your clothing because they break down fabrics. If you have a stain, try to treat it right away with a little hot water and undyed soap. Then you can just steam the fabric when you get home. Steaming is also a good alternative to dry cleaning if your aim is just to freshen your clothing after a wear of two until you are ready to wash it with gentle shampoo.
PERIODICALS – I have done away with all my magazine subscriptions, except one for boyfriend’s reading in the bathroom. lol. Sorry for being explicit. You can read most of the information on online versions of most newspapers and magazines. If you want premium content, most major newspapers and magazine offer online subscriptions now, but I advise not to complicate your life by doing so unless you need premium content for your job. Also, ask retailers to remove you from their mailing if you can so you don’t get catalogs and junk mail. When you do get catalogs or junk mail, recycle right away rather than letting them pile up. Don’t bother looking through them to browse unless there was something you were looking for previously.
BOOKS
I love the tactile-ness of books, but have only purchased a few books this entire year, since my husband bought me a Kindle Fire. I used to go on compulsive bookstore shopping at Strands and Barnes & Nobles. I still have held on to books not in eBook format, such as a few goth culture books, historical books on witchcraft and vampires, my collection of Poe and Lovecraft stories and my law books. However, all else have been replaced via eBook if the copyright has been expired, such as classics, like Wuthering Heights, and some of my psychology books. This saves so much time and space, and it looks so much like a book that the first few weeks of using it, I would reach for the edge as if turning a page. It is a little pricey, though cheaper than the Kindle, even though it was the first innovator of EBook technology. It is worth the price though in convenience and portability for your back, and think of how much you would save if you had to move all those books. Not to mention that it saves trees. All the classics are available in eBook format, and many current books are being produced as in eBook format (pdf) also. You can download classics, where copyrights have been expired, for free from Project Gutenberg and read in pdf format on the reader. These days, I only buy regular books if I really need them and cannot find it in a store. I also encourage supporting smaller booksellers when possible.
HOUSEKEEPING
Housecleaning takes up a lot of time if you have a lot of possessions, so the first thing that I recommend is clear out anything you have not used in the past year. This includes kitchen gadgets, office supplies, magazines, old video games and toys if you have children, etc., most of which can be donated to thrift stores. I also recommend getting rid of excess bins and containers because although they are marketed to keep clutter under control, they also keep you unaware of all the things that you actually own. The plastic in bins are also bad for the environment. I keep all kitchen items in accessible cupboards so they can be used regularly rather than stored somewhere. For two people who don’t usually entertain more than 4 people at a time, 6 forks, 6 knives, 6 spoons, 6 plates, 6 bowls and 6 glasses are sufficient. A lot of people have way too many house wares that they rarely or never use. We used to have only 2 of each, but since we like to have a few friends over instead of spending a lot of money dining out all the time, we bought a few more items, but not more than needed.
CLOTHING
I have said a lot about minimizing clothes in my other posts, since as a female that was my biggest area I had to minimize when I started this journey. I have to emphasize that I do not recommend storing clothes, shoes or coats where you cannot see them because you will not be aware of how much you actually have. I keep all my clothes hung up and shoes on wood shelves and in wood baskets. At the end of the season, I wash or steam all my clothing and put them in clear, reusable suit bags. I hate using plastic, but this makes it easier to see the items that I have in the event that I need an off season item and also to keep inventory of all that I have. Shoes that I am currently using go on a wood shelf near the door, and those not in use are in wooden baskets in the bottom of my closet.
FOOD
I am not a strict vegetarian, but try to eat meat and fish as little as possible. I used to be a strict vegetarian, but as I am anemic, I got very sick, and my doctor recommended that I eat a little more protein. So I eat fish and seafood 2 to 3 times a week, and once in a blue when I visit my boyfriend’s parent’s home, I eat chicken or pork if there is nothing else because I do not want to inconvenience them, but that is rare. That said, I try to eat simple, vegetarian food most of the time. It is better for the environment because of all the emissions and food required to maintain the food industry and for your health as studies have shown that communities that do not eat meat live longer. See the Cornell China Study, and the Oprah’s episode on centenarian (person who is at least 100 years old) populations around the world. I walk with vegetarian snacks, like Kashi cereal, dried fruits, etc., so if I am hungry and cannot find a vegetarian friendly menu or if it is too expensive such as in New York, I have sustenance to hold me out until I get home. I do my best not to eat chocolate, processed food or excess sugar, though I do have a fruit filled cookie or make flan or other desserts. I try to make deserts at home because there are no or less preservatives and less sugar than store bought items.
SKIN CARE
Use natural skin care products. It is better for the environment and your skin. Coincidentally, most natural products have fewer ingredients than other products. Look for those with the least ingredients and with no preservatives. If you don’t use face makeup (powder, foundation, concealer, blush, etc.), steaming your face with a soft wash cloth and boiling water should be sufficient. If you run out of natural products or can’t find them near your neighborhood, products for extremely sensitive skin, such as Cephatil or Eucerin, also have fewer ingredients.
HOUSE CLEANING
Baking soda and vinegar are miracle house cleaners, which were used before cleaners were mass marketed. You can use them to deodorize, clean stoves, counter tops, tubs, sinks, etc. Check this site for recipes/idea. I use baking soda to clean pots and pans, and soak dishes in baking soda and minimal water to loosen grease and food, but I am looking for an alternative to liquid soap to wash dishes. Any ideas?
LAUNDRY/DRY CLEANING
For delicate materials, such as silk, cashmere and merino wool (which encompass half of my wardrobe due to my sensitive skin), you can just use clear, cheap shampoo, like Suave, White Rain or Tresemme to hand wash them in lukewarm water. This saves money on the cleaners and protects the environment because dry cleaning solvents are dangerous for the environment and also bad for your clothing because they break down fabrics. If you have a stain, try to treat it right away with a little hot water and undyed soap. Then you can just steam the fabric when you get home. Steaming is also a good alternative to dry cleaning if your aim is just to freshen your clothing after a wear of two until you are ready to wash it with gentle shampoo.
PERIODICALS – I have done away with all my magazine subscriptions, except one for boyfriend’s reading in the bathroom. lol. Sorry for being explicit. You can read most of the information on online versions of most newspapers and magazines. If you want premium content, most major newspapers and magazine offer online subscriptions now, but I advise not to complicate your life by doing so unless you need premium content for your job. Also, ask retailers to remove you from their mailing if you can so you don’t get catalogs and junk mail. When you do get catalogs or junk mail, recycle right away rather than letting them pile up. Don’t bother looking through them to browse unless there was something you were looking for previously.
BOOKS
I love the tactile-ness of books, but have only purchased a few books this entire year, since my husband bought me a Kindle Fire. I used to go on compulsive bookstore shopping at Strands and Barnes & Nobles. I still have held on to books not in eBook format, such as a few goth culture books, historical books on witchcraft and vampires, my collection of Poe and Lovecraft stories and my law books. However, all else have been replaced via eBook if the copyright has been expired, such as classics, like Wuthering Heights, and some of my psychology books. This saves so much time and space, and it looks so much like a book that the first few weeks of using it, I would reach for the edge as if turning a page. It is a little pricey, though cheaper than the Kindle, even though it was the first innovator of EBook technology. It is worth the price though in convenience and portability for your back, and think of how much you would save if you had to move all those books. Not to mention that it saves trees. All the classics are available in eBook format, and many current books are being produced as in eBook format (pdf) also. You can download classics, where copyrights have been expired, for free from Project Gutenberg and read in pdf format on the reader. These days, I only buy regular books if I really need them and cannot find it in a store. I also encourage supporting smaller booksellers when possible.
HOUSEKEEPING
Housecleaning takes up a lot of time if you have a lot of possessions, so the first thing that I recommend is clear out anything you have not used in the past year. This includes kitchen gadgets, office supplies, magazines, old video games and toys if you have children, etc., most of which can be donated to thrift stores. I also recommend getting rid of excess bins and containers because although they are marketed to keep clutter under control, they also keep you unaware of all the things that you actually own. The plastic in bins are also bad for the environment. I keep all kitchen items in accessible cupboards so they can be used regularly rather than stored somewhere. For two people who don’t usually entertain more than 4 people at a time, 6 forks, 6 knives, 6 spoons, 6 plates, 6 bowls and 6 glasses are sufficient. A lot of people have way too many house wares that they rarely or never use. We used to have only 2 of each, but since we like to have a few friends over instead of spending a lot of money dining out all the time, we bought a few more items, but not more than needed.
CLOTHING
I have said a lot about minimizing clothes in my other posts, since as a female that was my biggest area I had to minimize when I started this journey. I have to emphasize that I do not recommend storing clothes, shoes or coats where you cannot see them because you will not be aware of how much you actually have. I keep all my clothes hung up and shoes on wood shelves and in wood baskets. At the end of the season, I wash or steam all my clothing and put them in clear, reusable suit bags. I hate using plastic, but this makes it easier to see the items that I have in the event that I need an off season item and also to keep inventory of all that I have. Shoes that I am currently using go on a wood shelf near the door, and those not in use are in wooden baskets in the bottom of my closet.
FOOD
I am not a strict vegetarian, but try to eat meat and fish as little as possible. I used to be a strict vegetarian, but as I am anemic, I got very sick, and my doctor recommended that I eat a little more protein. So I eat fish and seafood 2 to 3 times a week, and once in a blue when I visit my boyfriend’s parent’s home, I eat chicken or pork if there is nothing else because I do not want to inconvenience them, but that is rare. That said, I try to eat simple, vegetarian food most of the time. It is better for the environment because of all the emissions and food required to maintain the food industry and for your health as studies have shown that communities that do not eat meat live longer. See the Cornell China Study, and the Oprah’s episode on centenarian (person who is at least 100 years old) populations around the world. I walk with vegetarian snacks, like Kashi cereal, dried fruits, etc., so if I am hungry and cannot find a vegetarian friendly menu or if it is too expensive such as in New York, I have sustenance to hold me out until I get home. I do my best not to eat chocolate, processed food or excess sugar, though I do have a fruit filled cookie or make flan or other desserts. I try to make deserts at home because there are no or less preservatives and less sugar than store bought items.
Mar 24, 2012
Moderation for Progress
I have a high respect for people who are minimalist due to the sheer discipline. However, I have found that some people believe that doing so makes you automatically a successful and self fulfilled person. I was a minimalist for most of my life, although I did not give myself such a label. I had only clothing and items I used, except for my large library of books. In my mid twenties, I shopped a lot, trying to fit an image that friends said I needed in the corporate world. However, unlike before, many of the items I had were not really "me", but others style that they oppressed on me. So, in the last 4 years, I went on an extreme spin to be a minimalist. It was great to challenge myself to see how much I can live without. Yet, I don't feel that I moved much towards achieving success in life due to it. I enjoy material things, but was never attached to them nor did I ever have the mistaken belief that I would find happiness purely by obtaining stuff. However, the minimalist goals of living close to the land, living with less stuff, shopping less and finding more time for friends and family did not fulfill me in themselves. I have always seen family as important, and other than school loans, I have never been in debt over purchasing items. I don't believe in having stuff you don't use, nor buying stuff you don't use, though I have certainly had my mishaps. I also don't believe in rampant consumerism for the sake of it or for the false believe that it will fulfill you. Doing without is refreshing and freeing, but having also can create joy and comfort. Therefore, I find moderation, not minimalism or extreme materialism is a better way.
What struck me about many minimalists is that they are so extreme. Some harped at me for owning 20 pairs of shoes when I work in the corporate legal field and live in NYC where our streets are not forgiving on shoes, and where we have 4 seasons.
People seem to have categories of minimalism now, such as extreme minimalist or moderate minimalist, but these are highly arbitrary. You are either a minimalist (obsessed with reducing possessions & living with less), an materialist/extremist (obsessed with gaining material possessions) or a moderate. I think most people fall into the category of being moderate, and with anything in life, moderation may be be the best in most things. I personally do not consider myself a minimalist or a materialist, but rather a moderate.
I am not obsessed with material things, but I have no desire to be so strict on myself that I cannot enjoy a small shopping trip now and then. I donate regularly, so I am not so attached to things that I am not letting them go. While I have had guilt at wasting money on purchases that didn't fit into my lifestyle in the past, it was a valuable lesson learned, and one that I remember to not commit. I make time for friends and family, and know that they are a great treasure. However, I am aware that my peace and self fulfillment is most important as if I don't have those, I am not as pleasant, encouraging and kind as I could be. So, yes, I do want to move up in life. I have career goals that I want to achieve. I would like to live a comfortable life. However, I also have big dreams to help others if I am blessed enough to achieve wealth. My reasons for attaining career success are 1) to be self fulfilled and reach my highest potential, 2) to be self sufficient so I am not a burden or expense on my family and to build a life with my husband, and 3) to give back to my close family, close friends and society. They are all equally important goals to me. In being self fulfilled, I like to have nice things and enjoy beauty. It is not a need per se, but something that makes me happy to reward myself for my hard work.
So, extreme minimalists may not agree and look down. I know some who are not working or are just happy being where they are in life, just living on a small budget and hanging out with friends and family in most of their time. That may make them happy, and that is fine. I personally think contentment is commendable. However, as much as I love people and my loved ones, having goals and challenging myself to achieve is also integral to my happiness. So, to each his own.
Mar 20, 2012
Words to Inspire You
"Oh, my friend, it's not what they take away from you that counts. It's what you do with what you have left." - Hubert Humphrey
"Self-actualization refers to the desire for self-fulfillment, ...to the desire to become more and more what one is, to become everything that one is capable of becoming." - A.H. Maslow
"Self-actualization refers to the desire for self-fulfillment, ...to the desire to become more and more what one is, to become everything that one is capable of becoming." - A.H. Maslow
Words to Inspire You
"Oh, my friend, it's not what they take away from you that counts. It's what you do with what you have left." - Hubert Humphrey
"Self-actualization refers to the desire for self-fulfillment, ...to the desire to become more and more what one is, to become everything that one is capable of becoming." - A.H. Maslow
"Self-actualization refers to the desire for self-fulfillment, ...to the desire to become more and more what one is, to become everything that one is capable of becoming." - A.H. Maslow
Mar 12, 2012
The Greatest Skill - A Positive Attitude
I can attest to my performance in any area of life being contingent on my attitude. I am human, and I have had let criticisms and negative comments from some "friends" affect me, although I have been for most of my life, encouraging to friends. However, when it comes down to fulfillment in our life, we are ultimately responsible. So, in cases such as these, we should internally deflect these comments or defend ourselves and wait to see if the friends change this behavior. If they don't, distance yourself, and don't let them sully your attitude with their negativity. Sometimes, we also are our own spirit-dampener, whether it is because we are used to the habit of pessimism ourselves or if we are going through depression due to a rough time in our lives. However, a positive attitude is the greatest skill that we can have to make progress internally and externally in life. Comforting friends and expressing ourselves is not a bad thing. We all need that. Even criticism is not bad if the person does so with a solution to help us, and says it in a gentle way. However, people who are consistently miserable do not help themselves or the world at large. We will all have our moments, but as a whole, starting today, try to eradicate a consistently negative outlook from your own mind, and do not spread the poison of negativity. Every day is filled with gifts of life if we would only move the veils away and see clearly.
Here are some quotes that inspire me on the topic:
Here are some quotes that inspire me on the topic:
- Since the house is on fire, let us warm ourselves. -Italian Proverb
- Whatever you think the world is withholding from you, you are withholding from the world. ~Eckhart Tolle
- In the depth of winter I finally learned that there was in me an invincible summer. ~Albert Camus, Lyrical and Critical Essays
- If you don't think every day is a good day, just try missing one. -Cavett Robert
- Oh, my friend, it's not what they take away from you that counts. It's what you do with what you have left. -Hubert Humphrey
- Learn to smile at every situation. See it as an opportunity to prove your strength and ability. -Joe Brown
- A person will sometimes devote all his life to the development of one part of his body - the wishbone. -Robert Frost
- Life is a shipwreck, but we must not forget to sing in the lifeboats. ~Voltaire
- The sun shines and warms and lights us and we have no curiosity to know why this is so; but we ask the reason of all evil, of pain, and hunger, and mosquitoes and silly people. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
- If you aren't fired with enthusiasm, you will be fired with enthusiasm. ~Vince Lombardi
- My riches consist not in the extent of my possessions, but in the fewness of my wants. ~J. Brotherton
- I don't like that man. I must get to know him better. ~Abraham Lincoln
- I don't think of all the misery but of the beauty that still remains. ~Anne Frank, The Diary of a Young Girl
- The best things in life are unexpected - because there were no expectations. ~Eli Khamarov, Surviving on Planet Reebok
- Nothing contributes so much to tranquilize the mind as a steady purpose - a point on which the soul may fix its intellectual eye. ~Mary Wollstonecraft Shelley, Frankenstein, 1818
- Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things. ~Robert Brault, www.robertbrault.com
- Whenever you fall, pick something up. ~Oswald Avery
- Success is due less to ability than to zeal. ~Charles Buxton
- You're not going to make me have a bad day. If there's oxygen on earth and I'm breathing, it's going to be a good day. ~Cotton Fitzsimmons
- Look at everything as though you were seeing it either for the first or last time. ~Betty Smith
- The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same time, and still retain the ability to function. One should, for example, be able to see that things are hopeless and yet be determined to make them otherwise. ~F. Scott Fitzgerald
- I will not let anyone walk through my mind with their dirty feet. ~Mahatma Gandhi
- There's a saying among prospectors: "Go out looking for one thing, and that's all you'll ever find." ~Robert Flaherty
- The soul does not absorb negativity by accident, always by choice. ~Dodinsky, www.dodinsky.com
- Being a sex symbol has to do with an attitude, not looks. Most men think it's looks, most women know otherwise. ~Kathleen Turner
- We cannot direct the wind but we can adjust the sails. ~Author Unknown
- The block of granite which was an obstacle in the pathway of the weak, became a stepping-stone in the pathway of the strong. ~Thomas Carlyle
- We must be willing to get rid of the life we've planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us. ~Joseph Campbell
Ways of Letting Go of Possessions
When trying to streamline your life, many start with possessions. It is not the goal in itself, but a means to commence the goal and get on the path of meaningfulness. This is true for me as I am especially affected by my surroundings. It is a weird catch 22 as I enjoy beautiful things, but I also crave simplicity. How then do we reconcile this? The solution is easy: keep only the things that are useful and beautiful. However, that solution is not so easy when we think of it in terms of the mental steps to get there. For instance, what if you are a person like me, who likes to see beauty in almost everything. I sometimes look at winter tree branches, all grey and bare, but I see such beauty in their form and texture. I have always been this way, so it is innate in me. I have come to realize that this is a great quality to have in appreciating art and nature, and even life experiences. However, it sometime gets in the way of my simplifying and de-cluttering. Combine that with my highly analytical mind, and I am sometimes my own obstacle. For instance, I don't keep things that are in terrible condition, but I will sometimes cut a piece of a garment and turn it into another garment. So, sometimes, if an article is damaged, I still see possibility for it, and it has resulted in my having a lot of scrap material for sewing, even though I declutter my stash annually. I sometimes think when an item is not top rate anymore that thrift stores won't sell it, and it will just end up in the landfill, when I could just reconstruct it into a new garment.
The problem is that sewing is very time consuming, and I don't have a lot of time these days. The time that I take to make a new garment out of old ones can take hours, and I could've worked during those hours and made more money. So, I can't use the reason that I am keeping it so I won't waste money. I have also learned that it is futile to lament over money already spent and time lost time earning money that money. Then, there is the mental anguish in seeing so many items, and more time is also wasted taking care of the possessions, such as organizing them, cleaning them, and moving them when you move to a new apartment or home. The time it takes to Ebay them is not always beneficial. For instance, I sold a pair of boots recently that I purchased for $45, but sold only for $9.99 (not including shipping, although Ebay's fees consider shipping also). After Ebay fees, I only earned $8. However, it took me 20 minutes to take pictures, load on my computer and post a description. Then, I am sure that I spent about 35- 40 minutes total responding to buyer questions and checking periodically how it is doing. Then, packaging to ship, printing and taping postage, and taking it to the post office took about another 20 minutes. So, in all I would say, I spent about a minimum of 1 hour and 15 minutes to half to earn $8. If I was working, due to the fact that I have several years experience in the field, I would have made double that amount. I think that hour and a half would have been more well spent job hunting or studying for my graduate school exam. So, donating would seem to bring the highest return for my time.
I read this wonderful post that mentioned that one way to let go is to think about another person enjoying the object that you enjoy. This really struck a chord with me as the reason that I don't want to let go of some items is because they are in new or like new condition, and I still think they are lovely items. I just don't use them because they do not fit my lifestyle.
Along the lines of time vs money that I was just writing about, the joy that someone else can get out of an item is a comparative advantage to the time I spend trying to sell it and the money earned from that.
Thinking about letting go gives me immense respect for monks and yogis who abandon possessions so easily and quickly to live a monastic life. I have let go of many things in the past, and lived very simply before, but I still hesitate at times to let go at time due to living in the past and the future. I think the biggest secret to letting go is to practice living in the present. As the winter season is ending, think about what you did not use, and donate them. In the coming spring season, think about what you will actually use, and donate the rest. Someone else will be able to enjoy it, and once you let go, you will will feel even more free as you have less. In the initial letting go, I feel a little clinging and fear, but with every item that I let go, I feel the chains of the control of possessions loosen on me. Time and freedom are life's most valuable gifts.
Mar 6, 2012
Another Great INTJ Description
INTJ
Visionaries - ‘Time is of the essence.’
INTJs are self-assured analytical types with a great need to innovate to achieve their goals. They are usually very original, creative thinkers who need to feel and appear competent.
INTJs’ particular intellectual style comes from the interaction of their preferences for intuition and thinking. They are usually very gifted at seeing the big picture. They often talk about “mapping” things out in their head and seeing how things fit together. This makes them naturally drawn to systems-thinking or any type of thinking which requires facility with connection, abstraction and complexity. They are able to use these skills in the kind of careers which often attract them – architecture, law, and management. Many scientists and engineers have a preference for INTJ.
INTJs often appear to others first and foremost as thinking types. This is because thinking in all its forms – from critiquing to prioritising – is what INTJs most readily do when engaged with others. But at heart, they are primarily ideas people. It is when they spend time reflecting that INTJs find connections, operate on hunches, theorise and cultivate their vision. Unlike their outer life which is usually fairly structured and controlled, an INTJ’s inner life can sometimes seem a pretty chaotic maelstrom of possibilities and ideas.
Of all the types, INTJs are most motivated by “vision”. They have a great need to come up with a unifying idea of a future, improved state which is then their job to realise. This inner vision can be so strong for INTJs and so individual that they are often reckoned to be the most independent-minded of all the types. In other words, they will sometimes cling stubbornly to what they “know” to be true and they will refuse to listen to others.
INTJs have a great need to be purposeful. They need to feel they are continually achieving, moving towards their vision or improving their mastery or competence in some way. Time is truly “of the essence” for INTJs.
This often means that INTJs come across to others as potentially impatient and time-pressured. Of all the introvert types, INTJs reguarly communicate in ways which can make them appear like extraverts rather than introverts. For example, they tend to speak quickly and forcefully, putting a great deal of energy into their communications.
Their true introverted nature, however, can be seen in their need for privacy. To feel sane, INTJs must spend quality time alone. This may mean time for solitary pursuits or it may mean time for reading and writing. Like all NT types, they dislike social chit chat. If they are going to expend energy conversing they usually want it to be more puposeful than that. This means that INTJs can be difficult to really get to know.
Competence is an important issue for INTJs. They have a need to feel they are able to do everything very well and to appear competent to others. Many will say they will just not tackle jobs if they think they will not be very good at them. On the other hand, they can get bored easily and need to feel challenged.
As TJs they find it easy to keep their focus on being organised but like all NJ types their lack of attention to practical detail can mean their organisation falls apart slightly at the seams. They could misread their diary, for example, or pick up the wrong documents.
However, of all the N types, INTJs can sometimes be very good on detail if it is related in some way to the attainment of their bigger goal or if they feel their competence may be at stake in some way. Proof-reading documents, is a case in point. In these instances, they will go all out to ensure there are no mistakes.
The research on type preferences in the UK suggest that only 1.4% of the population have a preference for INTJ and that it is the least common type. It is not surprising then that most INTJs say that they are aware of being “different” from most of the people they meet.
Relationships, other than family and a few close personal friends, don’t usually matter greatly to INTJs yet they are often conscious of wanting to serve people in some way. Indeed many an INTJ’s vision is ultimately designed to make life better in some way for people.
But relationships with others can present a difficulty for INTJs. They know they cannot achieve their vision alone and they can drive others towards the same exacting standards of competence and commitment that they use for themselves. This can cause resentment, particularly if the INTJ has not learned to openly appreciate others and thank them for their efforts. Female INTJs often learn this lesson more readily than male INTJs.
Ultimately it is important for INTJs to keep their intuition within useful bounds. They must come to see that their inner vision is not always right. It can be overly abstract and impractical and not take adequate account of human feelings, frailties and values. They can become more effective if they learn to use their own thinking skills to critique their vision more and by soliciting and paying attention to other people’s views.
INTJ overview
Words to describe INTJs
reflective global independent
determined innovative original
quick focused objective
theoretical logical structured
analytical critical private
Careers attractive to INTJs
Management positions of all kinds, particularly senior management. Architecture, law, engineering, science, social science, research, management consultancy, computing.
Needs at work
- The opportunity to have a “vision”.
- To feel challenged and display their mastery..
- Privacy and time for reflection.
- May need encouragement to consider others’ views more.
Anticipated work/team strengths
- Having a strong vision for what the organisation could be like.
- Coming up with new ways of looking at problems.
- Finding logical flaws in other people’s thinking.
- Seeing the big picture and the movement of trends.
- Having the courage of their convictions and not being side tracked easily.
Potential problem areas
- May come up with a vision or ideas which are not practical enough.
- May stubbornly refuse to listen to others’ views.
- May not take adequate account of people’s feelings and needs and subsequently alienate others.
- May be so critical and confident of their opinions and goals that other types feel intimidated or driven.
- May be unaware of the impact their style is having on others.
Likely areas for improvement
- Considering and then factoring in the “human” element” in their decision-making.
- Deliberately consulting other types and considering their opinions before making decisions.
- Learning to thank and appreciate others for their efforts.
- Asking others for feedback.
Common relationship Issues for INTJs
INTJs show caring by spending time with people discussing things of interest to them or doing something which stimulates both parties’ interests in some way.
INTJs like others to admire their intellectual abilities and their insights. They also like people to respect their need for privacy and time to reflect.
INTJ Type Dynamics
Dominant – intuition – introverted
Auxiliary - thinking - extraverted
Tertiary - feeling
Inferior - sensing
This profile information is copyright and for review only. If you would like to buy a version of this for workshop/coaching use please see details about Enspired Profiles.
Source:http://www.centreforconfidence.co.uk/type-resources.php?pid=376
INTJ Communication & Relationships
As an INTJ, I have come to realize that my weakest point is relationships. I have a great group of close friends, and I am not shy and make acquaintances easily. I don't get nervous around new people or at interviews or networking events. However, my problem is expressing myself clearly. I express myself very well on paper, and most people think I am natural and articulate enough in person. Yet personally, I have a hard time saying precisely what I want to say, and I like to be precise. So, often times, after an encounter, even just a phone call on the phone, I think back that I could have said something in a better manner.
Another problem that I have is that I try to communicate with people through logic and reason, and I am sometimes short with people if they are not making sense logically, or especially if I feel that they are trying to persuade me to do something or assume their position on something that does not appeal to me. I am hard on myself also as I said before I will ruminate that I could've said something more logically and clearly. I don't have trouble finding the words to tell friends and family how I feel about them, but except for with my husband, I always feel a little awkward and exposed after. I think this is because I am a little uncomfortable expressing my feelings, but I still express them because I have learned over the years that you have to show people that you appreciate them. I have made the mistake of not putting enough effort in friendships and relationships before, and inadvertently loosing the connections due to emotional and mental distance from not maintaining friendships through regular gathering and consistent communication. Sometimes this letting friendships fall to the wayside was not because I did not care as I have missed some of those friends, but because I was not aware of how much work it takes to maintain friendships. However, with some other friendships, it was because I lost interest in the friendship, as I began to see little in common or because I did not see growth in it or in the other person.
It seems that this sort of miscommunication due to not wanting to be controlled mentally, and trying to see life and people through reason is common with INTJs. Here are some more details.
INTJs believe in constant growth in relationships, and strive for independence for themselves and their mates. They are constantly embarking on "fix-up" projects to improve the overall quality of their lives and relationships. They take their commitments seriously, but are open to redefining their vows, if they see something which may prove to be an improvement over the existing understanding. INTJs are not likely to be "touchy-feely" and overly affirming with their mates or children, and may at times be somewhat insensitive to their emotional needs. However, INTJs are in general extremely capable and intelligent individuals who strive to always be their best, and be moving in a positive direction. If they apply these basic goals to their personal relationships, they likely to enjoy happy and healthy interaction with their families and friends.
"To love means to open ourselves to the negative as well as the positive - to grief, sorrow, and disappointment as well as to joy, fulfillment, and an intensity of consciousness we did not know was possible before." -- Rollo May
INTJs live much of their lives inside their own heads. They constantly scan their environment for new ideas and theories which they can turn into plans and structures. Sometimes, what they see and understand intuitively within themselves is more pure and "perfect" than the reality of a close personal relationship. INTJs may have a problem reconciling their reality with their fantasy.
INTJs are not naturally in tune with their own feelings, or with what other people are feeling. They also have a tendency to believe that they are always right. While their self-confidence and esteem is attractive, their lack of sensitivity to others can be a problem if it causes them to inadvertantly hurt their partner's feelings. If this is a problem for an INTJ, they should remember to sometimes let their mate be the one who is right, and to try to be aware of the emotional effect that your words have upon them. In conflict situations, INTJs need to remember to be supportive to their mate's emotional needs, rather than treating the conflict as if it is an interesting idea to analyze.
Sexually, the INTJ enjoys thinking about intimacy, and about ways to perfect it. In positive relationships, their creativity and intensity shine through in this arena. In more negative relationships, they might enjoy thinking about sex more than actually doing it. They're likely to approach intimacy from a theoretical, creative perspective, rather than as an opportunity to express love and affection. Although, the INTJ who has learned the importance of these kinds of expressions to the health of their relationship is likely to be more verbally affectionate.
INTJs are able to leave relationships when they're over, and get on with their lives. They believe that this is the right thing to do. They may have more difficulty accomplishing the task than they like to exhibit to other people.
INTJs are highly intense, intelligent people who bring a lot of depth and insight into most major areas of their life. In terms of relationships, their greatest potential pitfall is the tendency to think about things rather than doing them, and their difficulty reconciling reality with their inner visions. INTJs are likely to be in positive, healthy relationships, because they're likely to leave relationships which aren't working for them (unless other circumstances prohibit that).
Although two well-developed individuals of any type can enjoy a healthy relationship, the INTJ's natural partner is the ENFP, or the ENTP. INTJ's dominant function of Introverted Intuition is best matched with a partner whose personality is dominated by Extraverted Intuition. How did we arrive at this?
"You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth...
Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies,
so He loves also the bow that is stable." -- Kahlil Gibran
As parents, INTJ's main goal is to raise their children to be intelligent, autonomous and independent. They want their kids to think for themselves and make their own decisions, and so are likely to give them room to grow, and to challenge their decisions and thoughts at key points in their lives.
The INTJ is not naturally likely to be an overly supportive or loving parental figure. Since their own need for expressions of love and affirmation is relatively low, they may have difficulty seeing that need in their children who have Feeling preferences. If they do see this sensitivity, they may not recognize or value the importance of feeding it. In such situations, there will be a distance between the INTJ and the child. This is a problem area for the INTJ, who should consciously remember to be aware of others' emotional needs.
INTJs are usually difficult to get to know well, and difficult to get close to. Those who are close to the INTJ will highly value them for their ideas and knowledge. Although INTJs are generally very serious-minded people, they also have been known to enjoy letting loose and having fun, if others pull them into it. They also can be really good at telling jokes, and exhibiting a sarcastic wit with a poker face.
The INTJ is not likely to choose to spend time with people who they feel don't have anything to offer the INTJ. They especially like to spend time with other Intuitive Thinkers, and also usually enjoy the company of Intuitive Feelers. These personality types love to theorize and speculate about ideas, and so can usually relate well to the INTJ, who loves to analyze ideas.
Many INTJs believe that they are always right. In some INTJs, this belief is quite obvious, while in others it is more subtle. Some people may have a difficult time accepting what they see as a "superior attitude" or "snobbery". Not to imply that INTJs are snobbish, just that some people with strong Feeling preferences may perceive them that way. And some individuals simply have no interest in the theoretical pursuits which the INTJ enjoys.
Source: http://www.personalitypage.com/html/INTJ_rel.html
Another problem that I have is that I try to communicate with people through logic and reason, and I am sometimes short with people if they are not making sense logically, or especially if I feel that they are trying to persuade me to do something or assume their position on something that does not appeal to me. I am hard on myself also as I said before I will ruminate that I could've said something more logically and clearly. I don't have trouble finding the words to tell friends and family how I feel about them, but except for with my husband, I always feel a little awkward and exposed after. I think this is because I am a little uncomfortable expressing my feelings, but I still express them because I have learned over the years that you have to show people that you appreciate them. I have made the mistake of not putting enough effort in friendships and relationships before, and inadvertently loosing the connections due to emotional and mental distance from not maintaining friendships through regular gathering and consistent communication. Sometimes this letting friendships fall to the wayside was not because I did not care as I have missed some of those friends, but because I was not aware of how much work it takes to maintain friendships. However, with some other friendships, it was because I lost interest in the friendship, as I began to see little in common or because I did not see growth in it or in the other person.
It seems that this sort of miscommunication due to not wanting to be controlled mentally, and trying to see life and people through reason is common with INTJs. Here are some more details.
INTJ Relationships
INTJs believe in constant growth in relationships, and strive for independence for themselves and their mates. They are constantly embarking on "fix-up" projects to improve the overall quality of their lives and relationships. They take their commitments seriously, but are open to redefining their vows, if they see something which may prove to be an improvement over the existing understanding. INTJs are not likely to be "touchy-feely" and overly affirming with their mates or children, and may at times be somewhat insensitive to their emotional needs. However, INTJs are in general extremely capable and intelligent individuals who strive to always be their best, and be moving in a positive direction. If they apply these basic goals to their personal relationships, they likely to enjoy happy and healthy interaction with their families and friends.
INTJ Strengths
- Not threatened by conflict or criticism
- Usually self-confident
- Take their relationships and commitments seriously
- Generally extremely intelligent and capable
- Able to leave a relationship which should be ended, although they may dwell on it in their minds for awhile afterwards
- Interested in "optimizing" their relationships
- Good listeners
INTJ Weaknesses
- Not naturally in tune with others feelings; may be insensitive at times
- May tend to respond to conflict with logic and reason, rather than the desired emotional support
- Not naturally good at expressing feelings and affections
- Tendency to believe that they're always right
- Tendency to be unwilling or unable to accept blame
- Their constant quest to improve everything may be taxing on relationships
- Tend to hold back part of themselves
INTJs as Lovers
"To love means to open ourselves to the negative as well as the positive - to grief, sorrow, and disappointment as well as to joy, fulfillment, and an intensity of consciousness we did not know was possible before." -- Rollo May
INTJs are not naturally in tune with their own feelings, or with what other people are feeling. They also have a tendency to believe that they are always right. While their self-confidence and esteem is attractive, their lack of sensitivity to others can be a problem if it causes them to inadvertantly hurt their partner's feelings. If this is a problem for an INTJ, they should remember to sometimes let their mate be the one who is right, and to try to be aware of the emotional effect that your words have upon them. In conflict situations, INTJs need to remember to be supportive to their mate's emotional needs, rather than treating the conflict as if it is an interesting idea to analyze.
Sexually, the INTJ enjoys thinking about intimacy, and about ways to perfect it. In positive relationships, their creativity and intensity shine through in this arena. In more negative relationships, they might enjoy thinking about sex more than actually doing it. They're likely to approach intimacy from a theoretical, creative perspective, rather than as an opportunity to express love and affection. Although, the INTJ who has learned the importance of these kinds of expressions to the health of their relationship is likely to be more verbally affectionate.
INTJs are able to leave relationships when they're over, and get on with their lives. They believe that this is the right thing to do. They may have more difficulty accomplishing the task than they like to exhibit to other people.
INTJs are highly intense, intelligent people who bring a lot of depth and insight into most major areas of their life. In terms of relationships, their greatest potential pitfall is the tendency to think about things rather than doing them, and their difficulty reconciling reality with their inner visions. INTJs are likely to be in positive, healthy relationships, because they're likely to leave relationships which aren't working for them (unless other circumstances prohibit that).
Although two well-developed individuals of any type can enjoy a healthy relationship, the INTJ's natural partner is the ENFP, or the ENTP. INTJ's dominant function of Introverted Intuition is best matched with a partner whose personality is dominated by Extraverted Intuition. How did we arrive at this?
INTJs as Parents
"You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth...
Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies,
so He loves also the bow that is stable." -- Kahlil Gibran
The INTJ is not naturally likely to be an overly supportive or loving parental figure. Since their own need for expressions of love and affirmation is relatively low, they may have difficulty seeing that need in their children who have Feeling preferences. If they do see this sensitivity, they may not recognize or value the importance of feeding it. In such situations, there will be a distance between the INTJ and the child. This is a problem area for the INTJ, who should consciously remember to be aware of others' emotional needs.
INTJs as Friends
INTJs are usually difficult to get to know well, and difficult to get close to. Those who are close to the INTJ will highly value them for their ideas and knowledge. Although INTJs are generally very serious-minded people, they also have been known to enjoy letting loose and having fun, if others pull them into it. They also can be really good at telling jokes, and exhibiting a sarcastic wit with a poker face.
The INTJ is not likely to choose to spend time with people who they feel don't have anything to offer the INTJ. They especially like to spend time with other Intuitive Thinkers, and also usually enjoy the company of Intuitive Feelers. These personality types love to theorize and speculate about ideas, and so can usually relate well to the INTJ, who loves to analyze ideas.
Many INTJs believe that they are always right. In some INTJs, this belief is quite obvious, while in others it is more subtle. Some people may have a difficult time accepting what they see as a "superior attitude" or "snobbery". Not to imply that INTJs are snobbish, just that some people with strong Feeling preferences may perceive them that way. And some individuals simply have no interest in the theoretical pursuits which the INTJ enjoys.
Source: http://www.personalitypage.com/html/INTJ_rel.html
Mar 2, 2012
Introverted HSP vs. Extrovert HSP
Some highly sensitive people are also extroverts or High Sensation Seeking. This article goes into it very well: Highly Sensitive People who are also High Sensation Seeking
At first, I thought that perhaps I am a high sensation seeker because I can be very social and I make acquaintances quickly. I also don't fear public speaking more than most people, have no problem taking leadership roles and also enjoy positive praise for my hard work. I also enjoy new experiences, such as traveling and meeting and getting to know people of different cultures and experiences. I also enjoy walks alone, sitting in a cafe and quietly observing people or reading a good book by myself.
I feel the intense need to retreat to re-cooperate after socializing. I need a few minutes alone every day and cannot be around people all day or else I feel drained. These are qualities of HSPs as well as introverts. However, if I stay home too much, I become jaded, down and loose energy. So, it seems that I acquire energy both from being alone and from being in the world. Curious to see if I am indeed a high sensation seeker, I took the HSS test, and scored 11, with 11 or more qualifying one as a high sensation. So I guess I am borderline. On a strictly Sensation Seeking Test, I scored 22 out of 40. Again, quite borderline.
Taking the Jung Test, I always place as an INTJ, with my introversion always being between 22-44%, which is slightly to moderately introverted. I am very reflective, analytical and enjoy working alone, but I also enjoy breaks to speak with a few people or just to go out and be in the world.
Curious to see what strictly introversion-extroversion tests would say, I got took the following.
This strictly Introversion Extroversion test gives me the result of being a being a balanced introvert extrovert:
This one, place me as a balanced Introvert Extrovert as well with my extroversion being 45%.
My Conclusion:
I am definitely a HSP and an introvert because much more than the need to interact and experience new things is my need to reflect and have time alone. However, the Jung tests are very accurate in placing me as a "moderate introvert", rather than a distinct or very distinct introvert. My social skills are developed enough, and I am not shy, but it seems that many INTJs are also very confidence. Perhaps we are more at ease with being introverts and show it through our quiet confidence. I am not always comfortable with social situations where I have little in common with others, but I don't fear or shrink from them, but rather see them as a challenge that I like to take on every now and then. Sometimes we can learn a lot though uncomfortable situations. Furthermore, INTJs are not only analytical and reflective, but they also enjoy taking action. Sometimes to take action and make changes, we have to engage in the world, take leadership and social roles, and I am glad I enjoy it enough to do so. Please tell me your thoughts.
I read this article on being an Introverted Extrovert, and it totally describes me as I believe that I am an introvert who is adept with certain extroverted tendencies.
Do any other INTJs think and relate similarly?
At first, I thought that perhaps I am a high sensation seeker because I can be very social and I make acquaintances quickly. I also don't fear public speaking more than most people, have no problem taking leadership roles and also enjoy positive praise for my hard work. I also enjoy new experiences, such as traveling and meeting and getting to know people of different cultures and experiences. I also enjoy walks alone, sitting in a cafe and quietly observing people or reading a good book by myself.
I feel the intense need to retreat to re-cooperate after socializing. I need a few minutes alone every day and cannot be around people all day or else I feel drained. These are qualities of HSPs as well as introverts. However, if I stay home too much, I become jaded, down and loose energy. So, it seems that I acquire energy both from being alone and from being in the world. Curious to see if I am indeed a high sensation seeker, I took the HSS test, and scored 11, with 11 or more qualifying one as a high sensation. So I guess I am borderline. On a strictly Sensation Seeking Test, I scored 22 out of 40. Again, quite borderline.
Taking the Jung Test, I always place as an INTJ, with my introversion always being between 22-44%, which is slightly to moderately introverted. I am very reflective, analytical and enjoy working alone, but I also enjoy breaks to speak with a few people or just to go out and be in the world.
Curious to see what strictly introversion-extroversion tests would say, I got took the following.
This strictly Introversion Extroversion test gives me the result of being a being a balanced introvert extrovert:
Your extroversion level is 52%
This means that you are well-balanced, not too concentrated on you inner life, but at the same time you don't depend on the outside world too much. You like either spending time with other people, or staying on your own analyzing your inner world and talking to yourself. Write us if you enjoyed this test.
This one, place me as a balanced Introvert Extrovert as well with my extroversion being 45%.
Extrovertedness: 45%
The Introvert-Extrovert Test
says that I'm Balanced
says that I'm Balanced
What does it mean?
You are fairly balanced in your introvert-extrovert personality. You like going out, but like to have time to yourself as well. You typically have a few great friends, and many that you can hang around with.
Extroverts:
-have motives and actions that are directed outward.
-are more prone to action than contemplation.
-are typically very friendly to unknown people.
-feel empowered in social situations.
Introverts:
-have motives and actions that are directed inward.
-tend to be preoccupied with their own thoughts and feelings.
-minimize their contact with other people.
Extroverts:
-have motives and actions that are directed outward.
-are more prone to action than contemplation.
-are typically very friendly to unknown people.
-feel empowered in social situations.
Introverts:
-have motives and actions that are directed inward.
-tend to be preoccupied with their own thoughts and feelings.
-minimize their contact with other people.
My Conclusion:
I am definitely a HSP and an introvert because much more than the need to interact and experience new things is my need to reflect and have time alone. However, the Jung tests are very accurate in placing me as a "moderate introvert", rather than a distinct or very distinct introvert. My social skills are developed enough, and I am not shy, but it seems that many INTJs are also very confidence. Perhaps we are more at ease with being introverts and show it through our quiet confidence. I am not always comfortable with social situations where I have little in common with others, but I don't fear or shrink from them, but rather see them as a challenge that I like to take on every now and then. Sometimes we can learn a lot though uncomfortable situations. Furthermore, INTJs are not only analytical and reflective, but they also enjoy taking action. Sometimes to take action and make changes, we have to engage in the world, take leadership and social roles, and I am glad I enjoy it enough to do so. Please tell me your thoughts.
I read this article on being an Introverted Extrovert, and it totally describes me as I believe that I am an introvert who is adept with certain extroverted tendencies.
Do any other INTJs think and relate similarly?
Careers & Skills for the Introverted Extrovert
Introverted extroverts are evolved extroverts. They've developed some of the characteristics of introverts, particularly socially. They're not true extroverts, because their style is quite different. Sharing a mix of the characteristics of two potentially very complex types makes IEs pretty complicated.
A rare few, those who were actually introverts but became semi-extroverts through their work, remain introverts, but have developed a range of social abilities. Introverts don't change drastically, but this form of the IE is what happens when they do. Their confidence has also developed enough for some selective extroversion.
IEs tend to be older, usually developing in early middle age or late adolescence. Experience has often dealt them some difficult cards, and frequently they've become a lot more advanced than people of their own age.
The extroverted part of the IE is the truly experienced campaigner. There will have been many situations, many lessons learned, and the IE tends to be a good student. The studious side, particularly the practical learning, interestingly, is the promoter of the introversions which transform the extrovert into an IE.
IEs are intelligent, and they recognize good working methods of doing things. Introverts have a lot of learning skills and habits which make them brilliant students, and the IE has no difficulty adopting them. They may also have introvert friends whose sheer ability has taught them how to use these skills. Their evolution is perfectly natural, and the result is a really effective hybrid.
The single accurate description of IEs is Low Key. IEs are the exact opposite of Extroverted Introverts in the sense that there are little or no theatrics. The IE doesn't bother to put on an act, because they assume others can see through acts as easily as they can. Their former extroversion remains functional as social judges, and in fact it's a major asset.
IEs have a huge advantage over other types. They're genuinely sensitive, like real introverts, but they have the social instincts of extroverts as well. As professionals in a career environment, this is usually a very good combination of abilities. They can see the raw nerves, and they know how to deal with them so no damage is done.
IEs are normally people who were good students, and became good professionals. As they mature, they improve their skills in doing business in their career environment. The days as a younger extrovert have given them some real toughness, but they've also evolved a lot of ability to empathize.
They don't tread on toes or try to belittle people. They can still be real extroverts when they feel like it, or when provoked, but that's not often. Usually they've completely outgrown it. If they suddenly become full powered extroverts, it generally means they're either annoyed, or enthusing like kids about something.
The ability to empathize is perhaps unique. IEs could make a career out of it. They're excellent negotiators and mediators. They know what's reasonable and what's not. They don't usually even need to ask what's acceptable to another party in a business deal.
This is partly professional skill, because they're always competent. However, it's also real understanding. Most IEs have had enough real life experience to be able to see the problems on a personal level as well as the purely professional. They know why something's a problem for a particular individual.
In the career environment, IEs are often hired as fixers as much as for their ability to make a good fit as for their work. Their mix of abilities means they're not too easily ruffled by any group of people, even the sometimes impossible EIs and the pure introverts, some of whom need a code book to be understood.
They're an indispensable asset to extroverts. The IE will be able to talk to the extrovert in the same language, with a perfectly genuine understanding of how the extrovert works. The IE also makes a very good sounding board for both the extrovert's and the introvert's endless streams of ideas. Both these types need people who can argue at their level, who have opinions and ideas of their own.
If that sounds like IEs have to be pretty good themselves to deal with very demanding people, that's exactly what it means. IEs are often leaders, CEOs, or managers, and they're extremely good in those positions because of their character. They can handle some of the most fiercely independent members of the other types, for that reason. They know why the introvert is frustrated, why the extrovert's chewing holes in the ceiling, and why the Extroverted Introvert is threatening suicide.
IEs know how to work with other people, and that fact is universally appreciated by everyone they work with. The IE is the one the warring tribes will bring in to make sense of the situation, when they've completely lost track of it. The IE will also be brought along to any business meeting, because of their ability to read the situation. It may not even be a conscious decision, but everyone will feel better if the highly experienced and knowledgeable IE is watching the store.
Another lesson IEs could teach the human race as a whole is that they never conflict with each other to the point where any damage is done. It simply would not cross the mind of an IE to even raise their voice, when disagreeing with another IE. Their disputes are more like games of chess, where the better thinking will win.
IEs will acknowledge good ideas, too, which is another invaluable career skill, sometimes totally lacking in some people. They will, invariably, promote talent. They never feel threatened by the skills of others. They're mentally much better adjusted to career issues than many others.
IEs can be highly competitive, but it's only in relation to things they care about. They're not competitive on principle, like extroverts, or despite themselves, like introverts. They'll do a good competitive interview for the job they've always wanted, because it really will be the job they've always wanted. IEs keep an eye on their career track, and being at heart realists, they will try to better their position. They are goal oriented, but most people don't notice that.
In career environments, their approach is good, because they don't get discouraged. It's part of their evolved state that they've acquired some of the sheer determination of introverts. To an introvert, nothing is impossible, just irritating. To the IE, nothing is impossible, it's just a matter of time.
Like extroverts, IEs create their environment to a large degree, but they do it cooperatively. Even as managers, in full control of environments, they remain low key, and don't become oppressive about their control.
Actually one difficulty in analyzing IEs is that they can be so low key they look like the janitor, not the boss. They're often underestimated because of their way of doing things.
Underestimating IEs is a real mistake. They can be seen as being too nice, too accommodating, too helpful. These perfectly natural traits are usually mistaken for weaknesses, which is entirely wrong. It doesn't bother the IE much if people don't know how to read them, but it gets on the nerves of the IE's friends. IEs have a lot of real friends, which they accumulate largely because of their habitual empathy and frequent fixing of other's problems. So those mistaking the IE for a doormat will soon find themselves on the receiving end from the IE's pure extrovert and pure introvert friends. Every once in a while the IE has to save their detractors from their friends.
The IE isn't a good person to try to pick on, when on their own, either. In some instances the IE, if required to fight, can become a very well organized mixture of the pure introvert and the pure extrovert. It's a hideously effective mix. At career level, the IE is a very strong professional. They can always stand on their own two feet. They're usually well connected, always respected, and have the career kudos to prove their abilities. Fortunately for their opponents, IEs aren't as nasty as the other types, unless someone's been fool enough to really push their buttons. It's no contest, either way. The IE will win.
IEs are never conspicuous or flashy and never play pecking order games. If they do, it's more likely to be as a joke against themselves among friends, not to be taken seriously. They don't need to show off, they know better, and they don't like it when others do, because they see it as a risk. They will make a point of not letting their friends of the other three types set themselves up for a fall like that either, on principle. IE's social skills are very reliable, and their advice is taken because their friends trust their judgment. They're good at keeping their friends safe.
Trust is another part of the large inventory of healthy career skills the IE works with on a regular basis. IEs can be trusted with sensitive information, and can be relied upon to keep their mouths firmly but tactfully shut. The IE, unlike many others, doesn't need to be told when to clam up on a subject, or why it needs doing. They will remain silent on basic principles. They're naturally suited to sensitive situations, where their trustworthiness is a relief to others.
IEs are not suited to the roles of extroverts. They can do the work, and are often as good as the pure extroverts, but they're rarely happy in the social hurricane environment in which the extroverts thrive. They simply don't like it. Trying to remake them into extroverts is like trying to make them into 5 year olds again. They've moved on, and it represents a step backwards.
For the introverted IE form, that environment is poison. They hate it, they're allergic to it, they loathe it, and despite their extroversion skills, and even if they can do the work, they'll already be on the way out the door.
They're also impossible to keep in any environment they dislike. To be strictly fair, they will work in uncomfortable situations when they know the work needs to be done, or to help out. However, if they find themselves in a position where they're expected to be extroverts, and are assessed in comparison with extroverts, they will consider themselves to be misinterpreted.
That means in IE language that an error of judgment has been made, and IEs don't have much faith in people who can't read other people. Because empathy and good character judgment are such basic parts of an IE's nature, misinterpretation equates to incompetence. It's a real faux pas just to make such a basic error of judgment, let alone expect the IE to live with it.
The IE can get another job in about 5 seconds. Unlike introverts, they're instantly recognizable for their skills. Managers should also note that losing the real social mechanics of their organization is not a good idea. IEs contribute a lot to their career environment, on all levels. Their mere presence will generate a bit of positive receptivity, even from office politicians, let alone the other three types. The IE's competence gives them authority in any social group, even when they're not managers, or even particularly well known.
Lack of recognition will annoy an IE. They know much better than almost anyone else, through their early years as extroverts, what a stop-start career means. They've done it before, and won't gladly tolerate any repeat performances. They'll vanish, overnight, and the gap they leave will horrify others in the workplace.
Unlike some, IEs don't need applause, but they do need to know that they're properly understood and that their work in particular is properly understood. This is particularly important among professional IEs whose judgment will tell them they're wasting their time in that job if their efforts are routinely disregarded.
IEs are highly motivated people, although you'd never guess it to speak to them, unless you're on a favorite topic. They do have ambitions, they're just not as neurotic about them as others. The motivation is usually shown by what jobs they go for, and the sort of studies and qualifications they do almost as permanent parts of their lives.
IEs share with introverts the ability to specialize, sometimes to extreme levels. Their extroverted components make them good explorers, and if you were to pick a group of people to land on another planet, the group of most qualified and enthusiastic explorers, apart from the extroverts, would be comprised of at least half IEs.
The IE is a truly brilliant team member. This is the best use of any IE, the one where they're naturally at their most effective. It's the career environment they prefer. They have their friends with them, and although they have a lot of introverted characteristics, they're not natural loners. Team environments, as long as they're real teams, are perfect for IEs to work on all levels. If the IE is in a position to use their talents without restriction, the extroverted component is also happy.
There's one further thing which needs mentioning. The IE, unlike anyone else, is never unreasonable. That's also an utterly non-negotiable part of their makeup. In a career situation, anything unreasonable is simply not acceptable. They will never be able to trust that situation, or the people involved. They'll know what will happen long before it happens. Their ability to empathize will be disgusted. They don't appreciate being able to virtually taste irrationality, greed, or plain stupidity. They won't tolerate it.
It's a good example of how truly competent IEs are. If you see an IE heading for the exit as a career move, you'd probably be best advised to follow.
A rare few, those who were actually introverts but became semi-extroverts through their work, remain introverts, but have developed a range of social abilities. Introverts don't change drastically, but this form of the IE is what happens when they do. Their confidence has also developed enough for some selective extroversion.
IEs tend to be older, usually developing in early middle age or late adolescence. Experience has often dealt them some difficult cards, and frequently they've become a lot more advanced than people of their own age.
The extroverted part of the IE is the truly experienced campaigner. There will have been many situations, many lessons learned, and the IE tends to be a good student. The studious side, particularly the practical learning, interestingly, is the promoter of the introversions which transform the extrovert into an IE.
IEs are intelligent, and they recognize good working methods of doing things. Introverts have a lot of learning skills and habits which make them brilliant students, and the IE has no difficulty adopting them. They may also have introvert friends whose sheer ability has taught them how to use these skills. Their evolution is perfectly natural, and the result is a really effective hybrid.
The single accurate description of IEs is Low Key. IEs are the exact opposite of Extroverted Introverts in the sense that there are little or no theatrics. The IE doesn't bother to put on an act, because they assume others can see through acts as easily as they can. Their former extroversion remains functional as social judges, and in fact it's a major asset.
IEs have a huge advantage over other types. They're genuinely sensitive, like real introverts, but they have the social instincts of extroverts as well. As professionals in a career environment, this is usually a very good combination of abilities. They can see the raw nerves, and they know how to deal with them so no damage is done.
IEs are normally people who were good students, and became good professionals. As they mature, they improve their skills in doing business in their career environment. The days as a younger extrovert have given them some real toughness, but they've also evolved a lot of ability to empathize.
They don't tread on toes or try to belittle people. They can still be real extroverts when they feel like it, or when provoked, but that's not often. Usually they've completely outgrown it. If they suddenly become full powered extroverts, it generally means they're either annoyed, or enthusing like kids about something.
The ability to empathize is perhaps unique. IEs could make a career out of it. They're excellent negotiators and mediators. They know what's reasonable and what's not. They don't usually even need to ask what's acceptable to another party in a business deal.
This is partly professional skill, because they're always competent. However, it's also real understanding. Most IEs have had enough real life experience to be able to see the problems on a personal level as well as the purely professional. They know why something's a problem for a particular individual.
In the career environment, IEs are often hired as fixers as much as for their ability to make a good fit as for their work. Their mix of abilities means they're not too easily ruffled by any group of people, even the sometimes impossible EIs and the pure introverts, some of whom need a code book to be understood.
They're an indispensable asset to extroverts. The IE will be able to talk to the extrovert in the same language, with a perfectly genuine understanding of how the extrovert works. The IE also makes a very good sounding board for both the extrovert's and the introvert's endless streams of ideas. Both these types need people who can argue at their level, who have opinions and ideas of their own.
If that sounds like IEs have to be pretty good themselves to deal with very demanding people, that's exactly what it means. IEs are often leaders, CEOs, or managers, and they're extremely good in those positions because of their character. They can handle some of the most fiercely independent members of the other types, for that reason. They know why the introvert is frustrated, why the extrovert's chewing holes in the ceiling, and why the Extroverted Introvert is threatening suicide.
IEs know how to work with other people, and that fact is universally appreciated by everyone they work with. The IE is the one the warring tribes will bring in to make sense of the situation, when they've completely lost track of it. The IE will also be brought along to any business meeting, because of their ability to read the situation. It may not even be a conscious decision, but everyone will feel better if the highly experienced and knowledgeable IE is watching the store.
Another lesson IEs could teach the human race as a whole is that they never conflict with each other to the point where any damage is done. It simply would not cross the mind of an IE to even raise their voice, when disagreeing with another IE. Their disputes are more like games of chess, where the better thinking will win.
IEs will acknowledge good ideas, too, which is another invaluable career skill, sometimes totally lacking in some people. They will, invariably, promote talent. They never feel threatened by the skills of others. They're mentally much better adjusted to career issues than many others.
IEs can be highly competitive, but it's only in relation to things they care about. They're not competitive on principle, like extroverts, or despite themselves, like introverts. They'll do a good competitive interview for the job they've always wanted, because it really will be the job they've always wanted. IEs keep an eye on their career track, and being at heart realists, they will try to better their position. They are goal oriented, but most people don't notice that.
In career environments, their approach is good, because they don't get discouraged. It's part of their evolved state that they've acquired some of the sheer determination of introverts. To an introvert, nothing is impossible, just irritating. To the IE, nothing is impossible, it's just a matter of time.
Like extroverts, IEs create their environment to a large degree, but they do it cooperatively. Even as managers, in full control of environments, they remain low key, and don't become oppressive about their control.
Actually one difficulty in analyzing IEs is that they can be so low key they look like the janitor, not the boss. They're often underestimated because of their way of doing things.
Underestimating IEs is a real mistake. They can be seen as being too nice, too accommodating, too helpful. These perfectly natural traits are usually mistaken for weaknesses, which is entirely wrong. It doesn't bother the IE much if people don't know how to read them, but it gets on the nerves of the IE's friends. IEs have a lot of real friends, which they accumulate largely because of their habitual empathy and frequent fixing of other's problems. So those mistaking the IE for a doormat will soon find themselves on the receiving end from the IE's pure extrovert and pure introvert friends. Every once in a while the IE has to save their detractors from their friends.
The IE isn't a good person to try to pick on, when on their own, either. In some instances the IE, if required to fight, can become a very well organized mixture of the pure introvert and the pure extrovert. It's a hideously effective mix. At career level, the IE is a very strong professional. They can always stand on their own two feet. They're usually well connected, always respected, and have the career kudos to prove their abilities. Fortunately for their opponents, IEs aren't as nasty as the other types, unless someone's been fool enough to really push their buttons. It's no contest, either way. The IE will win.
IEs are never conspicuous or flashy and never play pecking order games. If they do, it's more likely to be as a joke against themselves among friends, not to be taken seriously. They don't need to show off, they know better, and they don't like it when others do, because they see it as a risk. They will make a point of not letting their friends of the other three types set themselves up for a fall like that either, on principle. IE's social skills are very reliable, and their advice is taken because their friends trust their judgment. They're good at keeping their friends safe.
Trust is another part of the large inventory of healthy career skills the IE works with on a regular basis. IEs can be trusted with sensitive information, and can be relied upon to keep their mouths firmly but tactfully shut. The IE, unlike many others, doesn't need to be told when to clam up on a subject, or why it needs doing. They will remain silent on basic principles. They're naturally suited to sensitive situations, where their trustworthiness is a relief to others.
IEs are not suited to the roles of extroverts. They can do the work, and are often as good as the pure extroverts, but they're rarely happy in the social hurricane environment in which the extroverts thrive. They simply don't like it. Trying to remake them into extroverts is like trying to make them into 5 year olds again. They've moved on, and it represents a step backwards.
For the introverted IE form, that environment is poison. They hate it, they're allergic to it, they loathe it, and despite their extroversion skills, and even if they can do the work, they'll already be on the way out the door.
They're also impossible to keep in any environment they dislike. To be strictly fair, they will work in uncomfortable situations when they know the work needs to be done, or to help out. However, if they find themselves in a position where they're expected to be extroverts, and are assessed in comparison with extroverts, they will consider themselves to be misinterpreted.
That means in IE language that an error of judgment has been made, and IEs don't have much faith in people who can't read other people. Because empathy and good character judgment are such basic parts of an IE's nature, misinterpretation equates to incompetence. It's a real faux pas just to make such a basic error of judgment, let alone expect the IE to live with it.
The IE can get another job in about 5 seconds. Unlike introverts, they're instantly recognizable for their skills. Managers should also note that losing the real social mechanics of their organization is not a good idea. IEs contribute a lot to their career environment, on all levels. Their mere presence will generate a bit of positive receptivity, even from office politicians, let alone the other three types. The IE's competence gives them authority in any social group, even when they're not managers, or even particularly well known.
Lack of recognition will annoy an IE. They know much better than almost anyone else, through their early years as extroverts, what a stop-start career means. They've done it before, and won't gladly tolerate any repeat performances. They'll vanish, overnight, and the gap they leave will horrify others in the workplace.
Unlike some, IEs don't need applause, but they do need to know that they're properly understood and that their work in particular is properly understood. This is particularly important among professional IEs whose judgment will tell them they're wasting their time in that job if their efforts are routinely disregarded.
IEs are highly motivated people, although you'd never guess it to speak to them, unless you're on a favorite topic. They do have ambitions, they're just not as neurotic about them as others. The motivation is usually shown by what jobs they go for, and the sort of studies and qualifications they do almost as permanent parts of their lives.
IEs share with introverts the ability to specialize, sometimes to extreme levels. Their extroverted components make them good explorers, and if you were to pick a group of people to land on another planet, the group of most qualified and enthusiastic explorers, apart from the extroverts, would be comprised of at least half IEs.
The IE is a truly brilliant team member. This is the best use of any IE, the one where they're naturally at their most effective. It's the career environment they prefer. They have their friends with them, and although they have a lot of introverted characteristics, they're not natural loners. Team environments, as long as they're real teams, are perfect for IEs to work on all levels. If the IE is in a position to use their talents without restriction, the extroverted component is also happy.
There's one further thing which needs mentioning. The IE, unlike anyone else, is never unreasonable. That's also an utterly non-negotiable part of their makeup. In a career situation, anything unreasonable is simply not acceptable. They will never be able to trust that situation, or the people involved. They'll know what will happen long before it happens. Their ability to empathize will be disgusted. They don't appreciate being able to virtually taste irrationality, greed, or plain stupidity. They won't tolerate it.
It's a good example of how truly competent IEs are. If you see an IE heading for the exit as a career move, you'd probably be best advised to follow.
Source: http://www.cvtips.com/career-choice/best-careers-and-skills-for-introverted-extroverts.html
Best job environments for Introverted-Extroverts
Introverted Extroverts (IEs) lack the extreme skills in social situations of pure extroverts, and share some characteristics with introverts. They're a mixture of both, but they have their own individual characteristics which make them quite unique.
Many IEs have evolved from pure introversion to a working level of extroversion. Some are extroverts who've developed truly deep inner dimensions. They have a sufficient level of extroversion to be good communicators, and are much more comfortable in social and career environments than introverts. Their social instincts are sometimes highly developed, like extroverts, and they are frequently good mixers.
However, their basic origins are very like introverts, even with the ones who were formerly pure extroverts. They retain a lot of the personal characteristics of introverts, and are often empathic to pure introverts. IEs are relatively low key, compared to even mild extroverts, although the former extroverts can turn it off an on at will.
They're good listeners, as well as talkers. They can see multiple perspectives in any social situation, which makes them excellent mediators, because they really can see both sides of any dispute.
This ability is their unique skill, and they can use it effectively in any career situation. They're real thinkers, like introverts, and their role is often to think their way through social situations. They're very good trainers, because they can literally see what's happening with their trainees' thinking, and know what's worrying them.
They aren't born managers. But if they have enough experience, they're very good managers by any standards. They communicate at all levels of their workforce, and are never bullies, or unreasonable. It's against their instincts to be unfair. They get a lot of genuine respect for that characteristic from their subordinates and their managers. Their judgment of people is very good, and they find and fix social problems without needing to be asked.
IEs far prefer healthy social environments, and actively avoid anything that doesn't meet that criteria. They don't like, and usually won't tolerate, irrational behavior, even in their managers. They're honest to the bone, and are never going to be part of anything underhanded or illegal. They also dislike office gossip, and executive power games.
That makes them lousy at office politics, but they're usually so good at their jobs that they're never even considered as dispensable. The IE will be the one that does the difficult jobs well, puts in enormous amounts of time where necessary, and does really good work on a routine basis.
They're not actually unambitious, although they may seem uninterested in promotions and careerism as a whole. To the IE, like the introvert, the career is a personal thing, and they have their own ideas about what they consider to be success.
This mix of characteristics makes IEs very good original thinkers. In creative fields, they excel, because of the variety of perspectives they understand so well, and they love to innovate. To them, innovation is exploration, and sometimes problem solving as well. They share with introverts the love of mental challenges, and will tackle any difficult concept fearlessly, like introverts.
They're very fast learners. Only the pure introverts can keep up with them in terms of recognizing the importance and uses of learning skills. They learn well, and they're almost always as demanding as introverts in perfecting their new skills. They want to know everything about their own mistakes, and will go looking for reasons for any shortcomings in their own work, and fix them.
As mediators, IEs are unique, and utterly unlike the other three types, in that they do a lot of their best social work almost unconsciously. For the others, it's a conscious effort, but for the IE it's so normal that they may not even notice that they've successfully solved a personal dispute or problem.
Unfortunately for IEs, management may not notice it, either. Where their natural skills are properly understood, IEs can be high flyers, and much appreciated. Their skills in some fields, like mediation, product development, and consultancies are usually so advanced that they're impossible to overlook. But in other fields, like accountancy, or in bureaucracies, they can be almost ignored, however good their work may be.
Their talents have to be in areas where recognition is easy, to guarantee career success. Their thinking is their real skill, and in humdrum careers full of routines and standardized procedural situations, that thinking is seriously restricted, and lacks outlets.
Anywhere an idea has a perceived value, the IE has a good career.
Conversely, anywhere thinking is not required is a desert to the IE, like the introvert. They're as likely to suffer from restrictions on use of their talents as an extrovert, and can be as deeply offended and repelled by some career environments as an Extroverted Introvert.
IEs mix very well with the other types, because of their empathy, and can be relied upon to assist them. They're very effective as mentors and make excellent friends, because they can genuinely understand the personal difficulties of others. IEs are often interpreters between the other types, and can explain the logic of an introvert to an extrovert so that the extrovert actually understands what's involved in the introvert's thought processes.
IEs can also make an EI feel secure in a room full of extroverts. They understand the extrovert mentality, and can explain it in a few words so the EI doesn't misinterpret the situation. They can help an introvert deal with a presentation, simply by being there, and with a few reassuring words. They can help an extrovert avoid going insane while attempting to communicate with an office full of introverts. They do this simply by asking a few questions which will make the extrovert use the sort of concepts which the introverts will want to hear, rather than doing a sales pitch, which will bounce off the introverts.
They are born consultants. Their advice is always good, and they check their own thinking are rigorously as any introvert. When they give advice, it's honest advice. Their honesty applies to themselves, too, and no double standards or excuses are made. They would be devastated if they ever gave bad advice, as much out of empathy as out of sheer horror at their mistake. Fortunately for IEs, they don't often make mistakes.
Despite their social skills, IEs sometimes frighten other people with their sheer inscrutability, which is very like introverts, unless they make the extra effort to communicate their friendliness. It takes a bit of time to spot the IE, who can be mistaken for an introvert or an extrovert, at first glance.
IEs are very good information handlers, but they do it differently from introverts and extroverts. The multiple perspective function takes over control of information, and will make associations with those perspectives, in any situation. Possible clashes and conflicts will be seen in advance. Most importantly, IEs share with introverts the ability to find weak points in information, and have the added ability to make all possible connections to their work.
It's not uncommon for an introvert, who can always find the most obscure information imaginable, to recognize significant issues with that information, and pass it on to the IE. The introvert knows the IE will know what to do with it, and how best to use it. An extrovert, who has a very high level of exposure to information from a huge variety of sources, will make a point of passing on any odd-looking or implausible information to the IE, for the same reason.
IEs are true team players. They really can generate trust in such diametrically opposite types of people. In any group of people if you ask who's the person they would trust with sensitive or difficult information, it'll be an IE. This is not a coincidence. IEs are trusted because they are trustworthy, and so are their skills. Their empathy and their individualism makes them strong characters, even if they appear understated compared to others.
IEs, by definition, are not doormats. They won't demand respect, but they'll get it, and there won't be any doubt why they get it. They're invariably capable, competent, people, and they have no difficulty proving it. They will stand up for themselves on principle, and the big risk in getting into a dispute with an IE is that they'll prove themselves right. They make very good arguments, and they're tough to debate against.
The best way to antagonize an IE is to be blas� about their ideas, or superficial about something important. That will convince the IE that they're dealing with a lesser intelligence, or one that doesn't know its own job. IEs do not like incompetent people, any more than introverts. They're usually nicer about it, most of the time, but they're as ruthless as introverts at removing anyone they see as a liability. They make very good managers, fair, open-minded and understanding, but the IE's bottom line cannot be crossed.
They're much the same, as subordinates. The bottom line applies to those above them as much as those below. An IE is more likely to fire an employer than an employer is likely to fire an IE. As employees, or members of an organization, the bottom line is credibility. They won't stick around trying to un-destroy any workplace, business, or group which has passed their level of tolerance. If you see an IE walking out of your workplace, that workplace is in trouble of some sort, for sure. Their judgment is extremely good, particularly in older IEs, and they will get off a sinking ship well before it hits an iceberg.
IEs don't know the meaning of laziness. Their internal introversion is a very powerful driving force, usually unseen by most people. The extroverted part may seem perfectly normal, but the energy level is always high.
This is where the Extroverted part of the IE flourishes. They aren't as frenzied as the extroverts in full flight, or a silently ultra industrious as introverts, both of whom can handle gigantic workloads, but they're on a par with both. If you want something done, and done in a certain way, the IE is the one who'll do that. Introverts and extroverts can be absolutely brilliant, and so can IEs. But the IE will understand instantly what you want, and why you want it done that way. The others may need it explained to them, or not see the perspectives.
Another definite skill of the IE, devolving on that ability to understand the priorities of others, is project management. Given a set task, the IE can turn it into a work of art. Their extroversion is particularly good at dealing with stakeholders, negotiating the impossible, and their empathy with other types connects well with anyone involved. Better yet, from the IE's point of view, there are plenty of issues to solve, planning issues, budget problems, all of which is lots of fun, for any IE, who thrives on any mental work. The IE may well make a few remarks about getting paid for having fun in these situations, and mean it.
If you want to build a pyramid, the introvert may produce a spaceship shaped like a pyramid, and the extrovert might have it built two weeks before you mentioned you'd like to build it. The IE, however, will give you a beautiful pyramid, with the sphinxes you asked for, all under warranty, and quite possibly under budget, if anyone suggested there was likely to be a budget blowout, and made that a problem for the IE to solve.
All that's required is that they're left in peace to do their work, like introverts, and aren't ever confined to the point their talents are suffering, like extroverts. If they have an idea to present, they should be heard, and their idea evaluated. Even if that idea isn't feasible, you can bet good money on the fact that the next idea will be, because the IE will learn from any situation.
IEs are real assets, in any situation, in any career. Managers who see an IE in their midst are strongly advised to grab them, before your competition does.
Source: http://www.cvtips.com/career-choice/which-are-the-best-job-environments-for-introverted---extroverts.html
Many IEs have evolved from pure introversion to a working level of extroversion. Some are extroverts who've developed truly deep inner dimensions. They have a sufficient level of extroversion to be good communicators, and are much more comfortable in social and career environments than introverts. Their social instincts are sometimes highly developed, like extroverts, and they are frequently good mixers.
However, their basic origins are very like introverts, even with the ones who were formerly pure extroverts. They retain a lot of the personal characteristics of introverts, and are often empathic to pure introverts. IEs are relatively low key, compared to even mild extroverts, although the former extroverts can turn it off an on at will.
They're good listeners, as well as talkers. They can see multiple perspectives in any social situation, which makes them excellent mediators, because they really can see both sides of any dispute.
This ability is their unique skill, and they can use it effectively in any career situation. They're real thinkers, like introverts, and their role is often to think their way through social situations. They're very good trainers, because they can literally see what's happening with their trainees' thinking, and know what's worrying them.
They aren't born managers. But if they have enough experience, they're very good managers by any standards. They communicate at all levels of their workforce, and are never bullies, or unreasonable. It's against their instincts to be unfair. They get a lot of genuine respect for that characteristic from their subordinates and their managers. Their judgment of people is very good, and they find and fix social problems without needing to be asked.
IEs far prefer healthy social environments, and actively avoid anything that doesn't meet that criteria. They don't like, and usually won't tolerate, irrational behavior, even in their managers. They're honest to the bone, and are never going to be part of anything underhanded or illegal. They also dislike office gossip, and executive power games.
That makes them lousy at office politics, but they're usually so good at their jobs that they're never even considered as dispensable. The IE will be the one that does the difficult jobs well, puts in enormous amounts of time where necessary, and does really good work on a routine basis.
They're not actually unambitious, although they may seem uninterested in promotions and careerism as a whole. To the IE, like the introvert, the career is a personal thing, and they have their own ideas about what they consider to be success.
This mix of characteristics makes IEs very good original thinkers. In creative fields, they excel, because of the variety of perspectives they understand so well, and they love to innovate. To them, innovation is exploration, and sometimes problem solving as well. They share with introverts the love of mental challenges, and will tackle any difficult concept fearlessly, like introverts.
They're very fast learners. Only the pure introverts can keep up with them in terms of recognizing the importance and uses of learning skills. They learn well, and they're almost always as demanding as introverts in perfecting their new skills. They want to know everything about their own mistakes, and will go looking for reasons for any shortcomings in their own work, and fix them.
As mediators, IEs are unique, and utterly unlike the other three types, in that they do a lot of their best social work almost unconsciously. For the others, it's a conscious effort, but for the IE it's so normal that they may not even notice that they've successfully solved a personal dispute or problem.
Unfortunately for IEs, management may not notice it, either. Where their natural skills are properly understood, IEs can be high flyers, and much appreciated. Their skills in some fields, like mediation, product development, and consultancies are usually so advanced that they're impossible to overlook. But in other fields, like accountancy, or in bureaucracies, they can be almost ignored, however good their work may be.
Their talents have to be in areas where recognition is easy, to guarantee career success. Their thinking is their real skill, and in humdrum careers full of routines and standardized procedural situations, that thinking is seriously restricted, and lacks outlets.
Anywhere an idea has a perceived value, the IE has a good career.
Conversely, anywhere thinking is not required is a desert to the IE, like the introvert. They're as likely to suffer from restrictions on use of their talents as an extrovert, and can be as deeply offended and repelled by some career environments as an Extroverted Introvert.
IEs mix very well with the other types, because of their empathy, and can be relied upon to assist them. They're very effective as mentors and make excellent friends, because they can genuinely understand the personal difficulties of others. IEs are often interpreters between the other types, and can explain the logic of an introvert to an extrovert so that the extrovert actually understands what's involved in the introvert's thought processes.
IEs can also make an EI feel secure in a room full of extroverts. They understand the extrovert mentality, and can explain it in a few words so the EI doesn't misinterpret the situation. They can help an introvert deal with a presentation, simply by being there, and with a few reassuring words. They can help an extrovert avoid going insane while attempting to communicate with an office full of introverts. They do this simply by asking a few questions which will make the extrovert use the sort of concepts which the introverts will want to hear, rather than doing a sales pitch, which will bounce off the introverts.
They are born consultants. Their advice is always good, and they check their own thinking are rigorously as any introvert. When they give advice, it's honest advice. Their honesty applies to themselves, too, and no double standards or excuses are made. They would be devastated if they ever gave bad advice, as much out of empathy as out of sheer horror at their mistake. Fortunately for IEs, they don't often make mistakes.
Despite their social skills, IEs sometimes frighten other people with their sheer inscrutability, which is very like introverts, unless they make the extra effort to communicate their friendliness. It takes a bit of time to spot the IE, who can be mistaken for an introvert or an extrovert, at first glance.
IEs are very good information handlers, but they do it differently from introverts and extroverts. The multiple perspective function takes over control of information, and will make associations with those perspectives, in any situation. Possible clashes and conflicts will be seen in advance. Most importantly, IEs share with introverts the ability to find weak points in information, and have the added ability to make all possible connections to their work.
It's not uncommon for an introvert, who can always find the most obscure information imaginable, to recognize significant issues with that information, and pass it on to the IE. The introvert knows the IE will know what to do with it, and how best to use it. An extrovert, who has a very high level of exposure to information from a huge variety of sources, will make a point of passing on any odd-looking or implausible information to the IE, for the same reason.
IEs are true team players. They really can generate trust in such diametrically opposite types of people. In any group of people if you ask who's the person they would trust with sensitive or difficult information, it'll be an IE. This is not a coincidence. IEs are trusted because they are trustworthy, and so are their skills. Their empathy and their individualism makes them strong characters, even if they appear understated compared to others.
IEs, by definition, are not doormats. They won't demand respect, but they'll get it, and there won't be any doubt why they get it. They're invariably capable, competent, people, and they have no difficulty proving it. They will stand up for themselves on principle, and the big risk in getting into a dispute with an IE is that they'll prove themselves right. They make very good arguments, and they're tough to debate against.
The best way to antagonize an IE is to be blas� about their ideas, or superficial about something important. That will convince the IE that they're dealing with a lesser intelligence, or one that doesn't know its own job. IEs do not like incompetent people, any more than introverts. They're usually nicer about it, most of the time, but they're as ruthless as introverts at removing anyone they see as a liability. They make very good managers, fair, open-minded and understanding, but the IE's bottom line cannot be crossed.
They're much the same, as subordinates. The bottom line applies to those above them as much as those below. An IE is more likely to fire an employer than an employer is likely to fire an IE. As employees, or members of an organization, the bottom line is credibility. They won't stick around trying to un-destroy any workplace, business, or group which has passed their level of tolerance. If you see an IE walking out of your workplace, that workplace is in trouble of some sort, for sure. Their judgment is extremely good, particularly in older IEs, and they will get off a sinking ship well before it hits an iceberg.
IEs don't know the meaning of laziness. Their internal introversion is a very powerful driving force, usually unseen by most people. The extroverted part may seem perfectly normal, but the energy level is always high.
This is where the Extroverted part of the IE flourishes. They aren't as frenzied as the extroverts in full flight, or a silently ultra industrious as introverts, both of whom can handle gigantic workloads, but they're on a par with both. If you want something done, and done in a certain way, the IE is the one who'll do that. Introverts and extroverts can be absolutely brilliant, and so can IEs. But the IE will understand instantly what you want, and why you want it done that way. The others may need it explained to them, or not see the perspectives.
Another definite skill of the IE, devolving on that ability to understand the priorities of others, is project management. Given a set task, the IE can turn it into a work of art. Their extroversion is particularly good at dealing with stakeholders, negotiating the impossible, and their empathy with other types connects well with anyone involved. Better yet, from the IE's point of view, there are plenty of issues to solve, planning issues, budget problems, all of which is lots of fun, for any IE, who thrives on any mental work. The IE may well make a few remarks about getting paid for having fun in these situations, and mean it.
If you want to build a pyramid, the introvert may produce a spaceship shaped like a pyramid, and the extrovert might have it built two weeks before you mentioned you'd like to build it. The IE, however, will give you a beautiful pyramid, with the sphinxes you asked for, all under warranty, and quite possibly under budget, if anyone suggested there was likely to be a budget blowout, and made that a problem for the IE to solve.
All that's required is that they're left in peace to do their work, like introverts, and aren't ever confined to the point their talents are suffering, like extroverts. If they have an idea to present, they should be heard, and their idea evaluated. Even if that idea isn't feasible, you can bet good money on the fact that the next idea will be, because the IE will learn from any situation.
IEs are real assets, in any situation, in any career. Managers who see an IE in their midst are strongly advised to grab them, before your competition does.
Source: http://www.cvtips.com/career-choice/which-are-the-best-job-environments-for-introverted---extroverts.html
Best Careers for the Introverted Extrovert
Source: http://www.cvtips.com/career-choice/best-careers-and-skills-for-introverted-extroverts.html
Introverted extroverts are evolved extroverts. They've developed some of the characteristics of introverts, particularly socially. They're not true extroverts, because their style is quite different. Sharing a mix of the characteristics of two potentially very complex types makes IEs pretty complicated.A rare few, those who were actually introverts but became semi-extroverts through their work, remain introverts, but have developed a range of social abilities. Introverts don't change drastically, but this form of the IE is what happens when they do. Their confidence has also developed enough for some selective extroversion.
IEs tend to be older, usually developing in early middle age or late adolescence. Experience has often dealt them some difficult cards, and frequently they've become a lot more advanced than people of their own age.
The extroverted part of the IE is the truly experienced campaigner. There will have been many situations, many lessons learned, and the IE tends to be a good student. The studious side, particularly the practical learning, interestingly, is the promoter of the introversions which transform the extrovert into an IE.
IEs are intelligent, and they recognize good working methods of doing things. Introverts have a lot of learning skills and habits which make them brilliant students, and the IE has no difficulty adopting them. They may also have introvert friends whose sheer ability has taught them how to use these skills. Their evolution is perfectly natural, and the result is a really effective hybrid.
The single accurate description of IEs is Low Key. IEs are the exact opposite of Extroverted Introverts in the sense that there are little or no theatrics. The IE doesn't bother to put on an act, because they assume others can see through acts as easily as they can. Their former extroversion remains functional as social judges, and in fact it's a major asset.
IEs have a huge advantage over other types. They're genuinely sensitive, like real introverts, but they have the social instincts of extroverts as well. As professionals in a career environment, this is usually a very good combination of abilities. They can see the raw nerves, and they know how to deal with them so no damage is done.
IEs are normally people who were good students, and became good professionals. As they mature, they improve their skills in doing business in their career environment. The days as a younger extrovert have given them some real toughness, but they've also evolved a lot of ability to empathize.
They don't tread on toes or try to belittle people. They can still be real extroverts when they feel like it, or when provoked, but that's not often. Usually they've completely outgrown it. If they suddenly become full powered extroverts, it generally means they're either annoyed, or enthusing like kids about something.
The ability to empathize is perhaps unique. IEs could make a career out of it. They're excellent negotiators and mediators. They know what's reasonable and what's not. They don't usually even need to ask what's acceptable to another party in a business deal.
This is partly professional skill, because they're always competent. However, it's also real understanding. Most IEs have had enough real life experience to be able to see the problems on a personal level as well as the purely professional. They know why something's a problem for a particular individual.
In the career environment, IEs are often hired as fixers as much as for their ability to make a good fit as for their work. Their mix of abilities means they're not too easily ruffled by any group of people, even the sometimes impossible EIs and the pure introverts, some of whom need a code book to be understood.
They're an indispensable asset to extroverts. The IE will be able to talk to the extrovert in the same language, with a perfectly genuine understanding of how the extrovert works. The IE also makes a very good sounding board for both the extrovert's and the introvert's endless streams of ideas. Both these types need people who can argue at their level, who have opinions and ideas of their own.
If that sounds like IEs have to be pretty good themselves to deal with very demanding people, that's exactly what it means. IEs are often leaders, CEOs, or managers, and they're extremely good in those positions because of their character. They can handle some of the most fiercely independent members of the other types, for that reason. They know why the introvert is frustrated, why the extrovert's chewing holes in the ceiling, and why the Extroverted Introvert is threatening suicide.
IEs know how to work with other people, and that fact is universally appreciated by everyone they work with. The IE is the one the warring tribes will bring in to make sense of the situation, when they've completely lost track of it. The IE will also be brought along to any business meeting, because of their ability to read the situation. It may not even be a conscious decision, but everyone will feel better if the highly experienced and knowledgeable IE is watching the store.
Another lesson IEs could teach the human race as a whole is that they never conflict with each other to the point where any damage is done. It simply would not cross the mind of an IE to even raise their voice, when disagreeing with another IE. Their disputes are more like games of chess, where the better thinking will win.
IEs will acknowledge good ideas, too, which is another invaluable career skill, sometimes totally lacking in some people. They will, invariably, promote talent. They never feel threatened by the skills of others. They're mentally much better adjusted to career issues than many others.
IEs can be highly competitive, but it's only in relation to things they care about. They're not competitive on principle, like extroverts, or despite themselves, like introverts. They'll do a good competitive interview for the job they've always wanted, because it really will be the job they've always wanted. IEs keep an eye on their career track, and being at heart realists, they will try to better their position. They are goal oriented, but most people don't notice that.
In career environments, their approach is good, because they don't get discouraged. It's part of their evolved state that they've acquired some of the sheer determination of introverts. To an introvert, nothing is impossible, just irritating. To the IE, nothing is impossible, it's just a matter of time.
Like extroverts, IEs create their environment to a large degree, but they do it cooperatively. Even as managers, in full control of environments, they remain low key, and don't become oppressive about their control.
Actually one difficulty in analyzing IEs is that they can be so low key they look like the janitor, not the boss. They're often underestimated because of their way of doing things.
Underestimating IEs is a real mistake. They can be seen as being too nice, too accommodating, too helpful. These perfectly natural traits are usually mistaken for weaknesses, which is entirely wrong. It doesn't bother the IE much if people don't know how to read them, but it gets on the nerves of the IE's friends. IEs have a lot of real friends, which they accumulate largely because of their habitual empathy and frequent fixing of other's problems. So those mistaking the IE for a doormat will soon find themselves on the receiving end from the IE's pure extrovert and pure introvert friends. Every once in a while the IE has to save their detractors from their friends.
The IE isn't a good person to try to pick on, when on their own, either. In some instances the IE, if required to fight, can become a very well organized mixture of the pure introvert and the pure extrovert. It's a hideously effective mix. At career level, the IE is a very strong professional. They can always stand on their own two feet. They're usually well connected, always respected, and have the career kudos to prove their abilities.
Fortunately for their opponents, IEs aren't as nasty as the other types, unless someone's been fool enough to really push their buttons. It's no contest, either way. The IE will win.
IEs are never conspicuous or flashy and never play pecking order games. If they do, it's more likely to be as a joke against themselves among friends, not to be taken seriously. They don't need to show off, they know better, and they don't like it when others do, because they see it as a risk. They will make a point of not letting their friends of the other three types set themselves up for a fall like that either, on principle. IE's social skills are very reliable, and their advice is taken because their friends trust their judgment. They're good at keeping their friends safe.
Trust is another part of the large inventory of healthy career skills the IE works with on a regular basis. IEs can be trusted with sensitive information, and can be relied upon to keep their mouths firmly but tactfully shut. The IE, unlike many others, doesn't need to be told when to clam up on a subject, or why it needs doing. They will remain silent on basic principles. They're naturally suited to sensitive situations, where their trustworthiness is a relief to others.
IEs are not suited to the roles of extroverts. They can do the work, and are often as good as the pure extroverts, but they're rarely happy in the social hurricane environment in which the extroverts thrive. They simply don't like it. Trying to remake them into extroverts is like trying to make them into 5 year olds again. They've moved on, and it represents a step backwards.
For the introverted IE form, that environment is poison. They hate it, they're allergic to it, they loathe it, and despite their extroversion skills, and even if they can do the work, they'll already be on the way out the door.
They're also impossible to keep in any environment they dislike. To be strictly fair, they will work in uncomfortable situations when they know the work needs to be done, or to help out. However, if they find themselves in a position where they're expected to be extroverts, and are assessed in comparison with extroverts, they will consider themselves to be misinterpreted.
That means in IE language that an error of judgment has been made, and IEs don't have much faith in people who can't read other people. Because empathy and good character judgment are such basic parts of an IE's nature, misinterpretation equates to incompetence. It's a real faux pas just to make such a basic error of judgment, let alone expect the IE to live with it.
The IE can get another job in about 5 seconds. Unlike introverts, they're instantly recognizable for their skills. Managers should also note that losing the real social mechanics of their organization is not a good idea. IEs contribute a lot to their career environment, on all levels. Their mere presence will generate a bit of positive receptivity, even from office politicians, let alone the other three types. The IE's competence gives them authority in any social group, even when they're not managers, or even particularly well known.
Lack of recognition will annoy an IE. They know much better than almost anyone else, through their early years as extroverts, what a stop-start career means. They've done it before, and won't gladly tolerate any repeat performances. They'll vanish, overnight, and the gap they leave will horrify others in the workplace.
Unlike some, IEs don't need applause, but they do need to know that they're properly understood and that their work in particular is properly understood. This is particularly important among professional IEs whose judgment will tell them they're wasting their time in that job if their efforts are routinely disregarded.
IEs are highly motivated people, although you'd never guess it to speak to them, unless you're on a favorite topic. They do have ambitions, they're just not as neurotic about them as others. The motivation is usually shown by what jobs they go for, and the sort of studies and qualifications they do almost as permanent parts of their lives.
IEs share with introverts the ability to specialize, sometimes to extreme levels. Their extroverted components make them good explorers, and if you were to pick a group of people to land on another planet, the group of most qualified and enthusiastic explorers, apart from the extroverts, would be comprised of at least half IEs.
The IE is a truly brilliant team member. This is the best use of any IE, the one where they're naturally at their most effective. It's the career environment they prefer. They have their friends with them, and although they have a lot of introverted characteristics, they're not natural loners. Team environments, as long as they're real teams, are perfect for IEs to work on all levels. If the IE is in a position to use their talents without restriction, the extroverted component is also happy.
There's one further thing which needs mentioning. The IE, unlike anyone else, is never unreasonable. That's also an utterly non-negotiable part of their makeup. In a career situation, anything unreasonable is simply not acceptable. They will never be able to trust that situation, or the people involved. They'll know what will happen long before it happens. Their ability to empathize will be disgusted. They don't appreciate being able to virtually taste irrationality, greed, or plain stupidity. They won't tolerate it.
It's a good example of how truly competent IEs are. If you see an IE heading for the exit as a career move, you'd probably be best advised to follow.
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